Cleanup time!
Today was cleanup day in the ol' mobile home. I don't know why they call this a mobile home. It's huge! How would you move it anywhere? But that's not my problem. It's my house and I like it.
Our Mama Human, Cheesy, is trying to get things cleaned up so she can put up the Christmas tree. It was also Cleanup Day for Daria and Trent's home. So Daria and Trent went into Michael's room. They were playing on his bed when Isis got up there and jumped on Trent! She was warned that she couldn't do this, but of course she never listens to anybody. Since she's the only one of us who goes outside (she's sneaky, so Cheesy gave up and bought her a collar and a tag rather than trying to keep her inside) she got put out! It was funny, 'cause she really didn't want to go out. She wanted to keep jumping on Trent. But Big Mama says that we cats can give rabbits a disease called Pasturella, so she can't let us play rough with Daria and Trent.
When their home was clean, they went back in. I got yelled at for being in their home and not getting out when I was told. Big Mama took me out and I told her I didn't want to leave. She told me to quit acting like Isis. I was really mad about that and went to Michael's room to tell him how mean his mom is. All he did was say "hey, Goat" and go back to playing his silly computer game. Sometimes I think humans must have the same DNA as dogs, they can be so dumb!
Then our cat boxes and the dog area got cleaned. Someone (not me) had been going somewhere they shouldn't. Lucky for them that our Humans don't have DNA tracing kits because they would be in trouble for sure! They might even get "fixed" again!
Cheesy was yelling a bunch of things I can't write here and saying that someone was going to get "filleted" for going behind the shelf. I guess it was pretty nasty because I thought she was going to throw up on the carpet. This is a woman who can eat while looking at medical textbooks, so you know it was pretty disgusting!
I was kind of scared, but P.E., who is old and wise, told me that in all his time living with the family, nobody has ever gotten filleted, skinned or obliterated although these things have been threatened more than once. A cat named Boston got sent to live with Michael's dad, Bruce, because she kept going potty under Michael's bed but P.E. says this wasn't a punishment for her because she likes it better at his house. She didn't like Isis or Leon or Raymond.
I wish Cheesy would send Isis to live with Bruce, but P.E. says she won't because Isis does her business outside. Drat!
Bruce comes to visit Michael three times a week. He's nice to me, but he says I sound like a goat too. I don't know where these guys get this "goat" stuff! I am not a goat, I am a very pretty and friendly and smart cat! Anyway, a goat couldn't type nearly as good as I can. It would be hard for them with their silly hooves!
Michael got an early Christmas present of a stuffed animal in the shape of something called a "Vorpal Rabbit." It has long, sharp teeth. I hope I never meet a vorpal rabbit! I like Daria and Trent much better!
So we had a very adventurous evening, and nobody even got filleted. Everybody got fed, even the fish. And we are all happy and warm. I can't wait to see this Christmas tree thing that all the fuss is about. P.E. says it's fun to pull on the branches with your teeth but don't get caught, because you might really get filleted then! But if you're good you'll get new catnip toys and treats. So I'll try really hard not to get caught, and if anything does happen to the Christmas tree, I will blame it on Isis!
Love,
Trinity
Our Mama Human, Cheesy, is trying to get things cleaned up so she can put up the Christmas tree. It was also Cleanup Day for Daria and Trent's home. So Daria and Trent went into Michael's room. They were playing on his bed when Isis got up there and jumped on Trent! She was warned that she couldn't do this, but of course she never listens to anybody. Since she's the only one of us who goes outside (she's sneaky, so Cheesy gave up and bought her a collar and a tag rather than trying to keep her inside) she got put out! It was funny, 'cause she really didn't want to go out. She wanted to keep jumping on Trent. But Big Mama says that we cats can give rabbits a disease called Pasturella, so she can't let us play rough with Daria and Trent.
When their home was clean, they went back in. I got yelled at for being in their home and not getting out when I was told. Big Mama took me out and I told her I didn't want to leave. She told me to quit acting like Isis. I was really mad about that and went to Michael's room to tell him how mean his mom is. All he did was say "hey, Goat" and go back to playing his silly computer game. Sometimes I think humans must have the same DNA as dogs, they can be so dumb!
Then our cat boxes and the dog area got cleaned. Someone (not me) had been going somewhere they shouldn't. Lucky for them that our Humans don't have DNA tracing kits because they would be in trouble for sure! They might even get "fixed" again!
Cheesy was yelling a bunch of things I can't write here and saying that someone was going to get "filleted" for going behind the shelf. I guess it was pretty nasty because I thought she was going to throw up on the carpet. This is a woman who can eat while looking at medical textbooks, so you know it was pretty disgusting!
I was kind of scared, but P.E., who is old and wise, told me that in all his time living with the family, nobody has ever gotten filleted, skinned or obliterated although these things have been threatened more than once. A cat named Boston got sent to live with Michael's dad, Bruce, because she kept going potty under Michael's bed but P.E. says this wasn't a punishment for her because she likes it better at his house. She didn't like Isis or Leon or Raymond.
I wish Cheesy would send Isis to live with Bruce, but P.E. says she won't because Isis does her business outside. Drat!
Bruce comes to visit Michael three times a week. He's nice to me, but he says I sound like a goat too. I don't know where these guys get this "goat" stuff! I am not a goat, I am a very pretty and friendly and smart cat! Anyway, a goat couldn't type nearly as good as I can. It would be hard for them with their silly hooves!
Michael got an early Christmas present of a stuffed animal in the shape of something called a "Vorpal Rabbit." It has long, sharp teeth. I hope I never meet a vorpal rabbit! I like Daria and Trent much better!
So we had a very adventurous evening, and nobody even got filleted. Everybody got fed, even the fish. And we are all happy and warm. I can't wait to see this Christmas tree thing that all the fuss is about. P.E. says it's fun to pull on the branches with your teeth but don't get caught, because you might really get filleted then! But if you're good you'll get new catnip toys and treats. So I'll try really hard not to get caught, and if anything does happen to the Christmas tree, I will blame it on Isis!
Love,
Trinity
Comments
Thanks, Brittney, the hamster who commands Respect.